Let the liquor tell it.

Have you ever had a friend you haven’t seen in a while and the first thing they want to talk about is how much life has changed? I experienced this several seasons ago, I ran into a guy I grew up with and he wanted to catch up on old time. So his best notion to relieve his glory years was to go to the strip club. I agreed on the venue not particularly the reason but hey it’s for old time sake.

So on our way to the club he began to tell me the rundown of the do’s and don’ts of the strip club. Who am I to tell a man what information is irrelevant but I took a ear to what he said and his list began like this:

1) Don’t believe the hype- The women don’t want you they want the money. When they speak you should hear the cash register going off in your head because whatever they talking about is going to cost you.

2) Keep your ear on the DJ- The DJ can make or break you one music selection at time. So be careful and listen closely to hear when he mixes in new songs. Those could be costly decisions.

3) Don’t let the dancer loiter on your dime- Just like in the clothed workforce either your working or your not. If the dancer is doing anything besides dancing inform her that your not paying for anything that she’s doing right now.

Don’t get me wrong these were jewels that he was dropping but I knew this going in but I let him have his moment in the sun. In hind sight I never have this problem because I usually just drink when I go to strip clubs so these rules don’t really apply to me. My money goes to Honey Jack mixed with coke and Coronas with splash of grenadine those two drinks on repeat keeps me in the zone. So while I’m in the zone like the 1-3-1 I look over to my left and see my childhood breaking all the rules he told me about. He was at the bar with this dancer who’s dancing/sitting on him while she eats a 10pcs wings and fries meal. To make matters worst the DJ is spinning the latest and greatest on the 1’s and 2’s steady racking up the dollars. He looks over me, cause I guess he could feel my eyes beaming the side of his head. The dancer whispers something in his ear he smiles and begins to walk over to me and says to me ” aye bruh I ran out of money can you spot me a $20″ and it all seems to relevant let the liquor tell it.